Just a Little Rant

When you’re a Soldierette at war,
And the dudes are hittin it just right. 
Nothing cleans up the mess
like a box of baby wipes.

In General, the World is Filled With A**holes!

It seems that over the last year, I encounter assholes or people with asshole tendencies from the moment I leave my house until I arrive back home to the solitude of my bedroom. Of course, that is only if I don’t turn on the television or go on the internet. And it seems that out of all of the places that I have lived, Northern Virginia has the highest asshole rate per capita (Olympia/Tumwater, Washington has the least) but believe me, they are everywhere. It is absolutely ridiculous and at this point I feel  that although talking about it may make me an asshole too, I most definitely need to speak on it.

Before I speak on specific asshole behavior that generally drives me crazy, I must point out that a big part of the problem is that people don’t realize or don’t want to realize that they are actually doing something wrong, that they have extremely bad manners and are very uncouth, and in some extreme cases, shouldn’t be allowed in the company of civilized people. I also must acknowledge that some people might be put off by the term asshole. I can understand that. One may just want to refer to them as rude, or ill-mannered, but for me, that doesn’t seem to quite cover it. I would imagine that “Sean Puff Daddy P-Diddy Combs” would call it Bitchassness, which was a title consideration but my mother is probably already rolling over in her grave at the thought that I included Ass in the title, add the word Bitch and she would probably come back to strangle me. And of course there are those that would put it mildly and say that people are just being jerks. But for me asshole pretty much describes people who don’t seem to give a damn about how they treat other people. And just to call them asses would insult donkeys so the hole makes it animal friendly and gives it just the right bite. In any case, I am sure that some clergy-people, older relatives, and my holy roller friends will have a big problem with my word choice and out of respect, I will refrain from calling them a**holes…in public. But I have seriously, seriously digressed.

There have been many classes on charm and books written by people on how to act, from those who have attended West Point to a Countess from a popular reality tv show. But I think that these things don’t often work because they are too nice in their execution, and frankly, when speaking to an asshole, you have to be a little more blunt and straightforward.  In addition, sometimes people need to realize what they are doing wrong before they can understand how to do things right.  They need a picture book that illustrates, do this…not that!! I mean, let’s be honest, real live, true assholes are obviously not very bright or else they wouldn’t be rude to restaurant servers who have the ability to put “the special sauce” in their food.  So although calling people out for their assholishness may be blunt and…well assholish…being passive aggressive has an air of assholishness to it too, and I just refuse to do it here. If you’re an asshole, you’re an asshole. I’m not going to apologize for pointing it out.

So anyway,  I am breaking it down, because there are just too many assholes in the world, and maybe if those of us who are nice people, who speak to others in elevators, who clean up after our dogs on the street, and who hold the door open for the person behind us would speak up and say, “ENOUGH ASSHOLE!” we can reduce the rate of assholes that are taking up all the space in the world or at least give them a small taste of their own medicine.

Random Photo

I have been told sad, sexy, angry, and even longing. What does this photograph say to you?

Relationship Tip #102

Ladies, if you want a man to WANT to spend time with you, leave him alone sometimes and give him a reason to miss you. Fellas, if you want a woman to understand you better, talk to her clearly and TRUTHFULLY from the heart, instead of saying what you THINK she wants to hear.

Relationship Tip #101

LADIES, if a man gives you a compliment, thank him graciously and move on. Don’t spend the next 30 minutes drawing his attention to all of your flaws and then find yourself wondering why he never says nice things about you anymore. And FELLAS, if you have nothing nice to say about the women around you, perhaps the problem is not THEM, perhaps it is YOU!!

Cali Girl in the DMV #3

The scene after the February 5th 2010 snowstorm.

So I have been living here for six months and so far I am loving it. I am even loving all of the snow that we are getting. I don’t know how much longer I can stand it, but so far being snowed in isn’t half bad.

Last week we got two feet of snow and as of this writing, they have reported that we are currently measuring up to eight additional inches. What a memorable way to spend my first winter in the D.C., Maryland, Virginia area.

Never a Dull Moment in Customer Service.

I recently took a job at a local Crate and Barrel. Love the store and most of the people that I work with. But boy some of the customers make you want to reach across the counter and slap them into next month.

Like the one customer who came in on Christmas Eve to return a Salt and Pepper shaker that she had purchased over a year before. She bragged about being done with her Christmas shopping in November, which leaves me to believe that her sole purpose for coming in the store that day, was so she could deliberately annoy the already stressed out sales associates.

Oh and then there are the customers that you get who are on their cell phones while trying to conduct a transaction. We should put up signs like they do at the DMV saying that if you are on your cell phone, you will receive no service. It is extremely rude, especially when the person is trying to return ten things, exchange one and purchase 20 other items.

But the thing that gets under my skin the most are the people who look down on the people who work in retail. Don’t assume that because you see me standing behind the counter that I have nothing better to do than be your beck and call girl. Don’t assume that I have no education. The average sales associate has at least one degree and is usually working on a second. Sales associates are also excellent multi-taskers, actors (you thought that smile was real), and amazing networkers. And over time, they can build a knowledge database that rivals your best online resource.

So the next time you enter a Crate and Barrel, or any other retail establishment, if you don’t want to end up the topic of a blog post discussing how rude, idiotic, or just plain ridiculous you may be as a customer, mind your manners and put away your cell phone.

Thank you and have a nice day.

A Year to Find My Passion

I was having a conversation with my hubby a few weeks ago and he commented on how he wishes that he could do a lot of the things that I do, paint, write, decorate. He also commented that he wishes he could learn as fast as I do.

“I would be a millionaire several times over if I had your talent.” he commented while shaking his head.

“I know that I am good at a lot of things,” I replied, “I just get bored very easily. I really don’t have a passion for anything.”

Well, you would have thought that I had said that I didn’t believe in God, or that I was planning on setting the house on fire.

My hubby was literally floored. He couldn’t understand how I have lived for 39 years and not have a passion for anything.

“You have to be passionate about something!” He exclaimed rather passionately.

“Nope! There is absolutely nothing that I have done that I want to keep doing forever or for any length of time for that matter. Everything that I do gets boring after a while. That is just the way I am. That doesn’t mean something is wrong with me.” I said rather defensively.

“Lady, you have a year to find your passion.” He declared.

“What?”

“You heard me, you have whole year to figure out what you’re passionate about.”

I guess I should explain. Sometimes the Army deploys its employees overseas, in case you didn’t know. And my hubby is not exempt. He has been gone for almost a month. His deployment is for a year give or take a month or two and he thought this would be the perfect time for me to “find my passion.” As if being an Army wife isn’t enough work.

So what is my passion? More important, why don’t I have one? Is there something wrong with me? Or am I like a lot of people who are content with moving from idea to idea and never settling on any one thing?

Is it design, art, singing? Who knows? I like all of those things, but would I do any of them for a living? Would I be okay if I never did any of them again? For many years, I thought it was my family, my kids, my household. But kids don’t stay forever. They leave and start lives and pursue passions of their own.

Whatever the case, I have a year, give or take a few days to figure it out. To figure me out. So why do I just want to pull the covers up over my head and hide out in the safety and tranquility of my bed for the next 360 plus days? Now that is something I can be passionate about.

Cali Girl in the DMV #2

Days 3-6 have been all about exploring. I am usually really great at figuring out a place in the few days, but I have to admit, manuevering around the NOVA area is going to be just a tad more difficult than learning my way around Seoul, Korea. Who knew? Today on a morning coffee run I accidentally took a wrong turn and headed across the river toward D.C. It was absolutely beautiful!  All of the buildings and the people walking around going on about their Sunday morning business. I really wanted to go into that area of D.C. and explore a little bit since I have never seen it from that vantage point, but I didn’t have time. I will be doing it for sure in the near future.

I also ventured out to the S. Columbia Pike Farmers Market to see what they had to offer. This one was very small and I have the feeling that it has not been around for too long. I am sure when the area has fully undergone a complete revitalization, the Farmer’s Market will be awesome. I am just optimistic like that.

On Saturday, I went to McLean Virginia to check out what was going on there. They have a really good mall called, Tyson’s Corner. Just about any store that you would find in any major city is there. I met this extremely funny, extremely charming young lady named Kerri who works at West Elm, a furniture store. She was helpful with ideas for places to go in DC for decorating and art and the like. She is also a transplant from Vermont who really seems to enjoy the area, and she assured me that I would as well. It was a pleasure meeting her, she was a ray of sunshine.

The overall area seemed a little more suburban and relatively more upscale than Arlington. But who really knows if that is true? I went there primarily to see the different stores there and what that area had to offer, but I couldn’t help but notice the biggest thing there as well as in Arlington, the diversity when it comes to the people. If there is actually such a thing as a melting pot, the NOVA area is it.

The area that I live in is definitely hopping at night. There is a second run movie theater and Drafthouse on one corner and lots of restaruants and shops all around. I have notice that the tow trucks are very tow happy. There were at least 8 cars towed just last night. After midnight, a lady’s car was being towed and the alarm was going off. She managed to run out and stop the guy from taking it. I just thought, “Boy, was she lucky.”  There are lots of sounds and things to look out and see at night. The traffic, and people walking, and waiting for buses are all really interesting to me since I have primarily lived in the suburbs for most of my adult life. In many ways, it is very calming. Strange, I know.

Mainly for the last few days, I have just been driving around and washing clothes and hanging out in my apartment clubhouse waiting for my furniture to be delivered. Sleeping on the floor is not comfortable at all, and I will definitely pack an Aero Bed the next time I move, I am not 20 anymore. In all, I am enjoying my new surroundings and I can’t wait to really get out and meet people. I would love to have a wonderful social circle of real friends here in the area. Especially because I know that any circle of friends here will be a very diverse one.

Until next time, take care and remember, change can be really good for the soul.

Cali Girl in the DMV

Days  one and two of my great big move to Northern Virginia has been all about apartment hunting and an awesome test in patience. The NOVA area is indeed a wonderful place in my humble opinion. The area has a great deal to offer. If one is interested in the arts, politics, good food, shopping, and even nature, it is all here. There are cute little walking areas, business areas, regular city-like areas and wonderful malls. It would seem that everything that a person could need is right here in Virginia, with Washington, DC right on the otherside of the Potomac.

In the past two days, we looked at several properties for rent. The first was a very brand new property, The Alexan Carlyle located near Carlyle Square in Alexandria, VA. It appears that once these apartments are finished, they will be very cute and very modern. At this point the first building is nearly complete, and they are currently only renting on the 1st and 2nd floor. It is within walking distance of a cute little roundabout of shops, cafes, and restaurants and located behind the Patent and Trademark Offices. It would have been a good choice, but they had only rented to three other residences and we would be the fourth, and there was dust and construction everywhere and I didn’t see an end in sight.

We went to the Clayborne in Alexandria, which was nice, but only had a 2 bedroom 1 bath available, and then to The Linc  in another part of town. The Linc did have a den, if it could be called that. It looked more like a nook or a place to put a window seat. Pretty much it was just an extra space. In addition, we were being shown the apartment with two other ladies who I can only assume were mother and daughter. They both seemed to be on the snobby side and were whispering to each other and staring at us with funny looks on their faces every time we asked the leasing agent a question. I hope this isn’t an indicator of the way people act in this area. I do know for sure that I had no desire to have either of them as neighbors. This is not a judgement on the place itself, but perhaps the management staff should consider giving separate tours to prospective tenants. Ultimately, The Linc was too small and the look of the apartments seemed more like a hotel than an apartment home.

We looked at the Monarch, which seemed ideal. I was really drawn to the Starbucks and Boxing Gym on the ground level. The area seemed to be thriving and there was lot to do within walking distance. I definitely need to make a note to go back and take one of the boxing classes. The exercisers could be seen through the window working out with the big punching bags. Looked like a whole lot of fun and a great way to work out some aggression.

Alexandria had some very interesting things to offer on day one. On day two, we set out  to look around in Arlington. Our first visit was to the Gramercy at the Metropolitan Park. All I can say is, “Wow!!!” This apartment building has everything one could even think of wanting in a place to live. The retro style building has a  beautiful pool and outdoor lounge area, huge fitness center, state of the art business and conference center, a movie theater, hardwood floors, a huge clubroom that can be rented for parties, and the amenities go on and on. They even had a two bedroom with den available and the den was actually den-sized. And the best part of all, this community was within walking distance of the wonderful Fashion Center at Pentagon City. Of course all of this luxury comes with a price that was at the higher end of our price range. I have to say though, in spite of price, this beauty would be hard for anyone to pass up. The Gramercy is most definitely a contender.

We stopped by The Halstead Tower and The Avalon at Arlington Square, but aparently they weren’t really interested in renting any apartments, because the The Halstead Tower was having some kind of training, so “all” of their people were too busy to come and talk to us, even to make an appointment. The Concierge only talked to us, when she realized that we had been standing there waiting after she passed by us to go to the water cooler and to talk to some other people. And the people at The Avalon decided that it would be a good idea to just take the day off. So that was that, there was no need to look any further. I will say that the lobby of The Halstead Towers was very artsy and cool, but of course that was not enough to make me go back on the off chance that someone may or may not help me.

IO` Piazza was extremely cute. There was no pool though, and the building seemed overly animal friendly. The draw to this particular place was the cute little walking area of Shirlington with lots of shops and places to eat and what looked to be like a really decent library. This building was built initally as a building of condos to be bought rather than rented, so there were a lot of extra nice fixtures and touches that you don’t normally get in an apartment community. There were hardwood floors throughout, the bathrooms boasted slate tiles and the appliances seemed to be on the higher end. Of course, we were looking at the model, so that could have a lot to do with how pretty and perfect everything was. Overall, it was very cute and met our needs at the right price, so it is definitely on the list.

We ended the day by looking at the Halstead at Arlington. A very chic, very new building with lots of extra amenities like Sunset Yoga, Pet Appreciation Day, and Virtual Golf, at a price somewhat below most  of the properties with similar features. Coming from a very suburban place in California, the surrounding neighborhood appeared to be a little seedy, but I couldn’t find anyone who had anything really bad to say about it, so perhaps looks can truly be deceiving. And I knew that when I chose to move to the city, everything wasn’t going to be perfectly new and manicured like the suburbs, that would defeat the move to a city in the first place. I must say that I was rather surprised at the number of people walking around the area visiting the local diners and businesses in the evening. This was definitely a plus.

The price range for a two bedroom, two bath was $1700 per month, on the lower end at The Linc, in Alexandria, to $3800 per month on the higher end at The Gramercy at Metropolitan Park on the higher end.

This area definitely has a lot to offer, from the diversity of the people to a wide range of housing choices and amenities. There seems to be enough to appeal to most everyone.

I will not say which property we actually picked for obvious reasons, but I do believe that just about any of the places on the list would be a great start if one is looking to live in the NOVA area. With all that has been built here and that will be built in the future, any prospective move to this area could be a truly satisfying experience.

Until next time.